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The Untold Story

Posted: Sat Aug 15, 2009 3:59 pm
by Alak
***READ FIRST***

This is my first short story (outside of school) and it features my original character, Orcariner, as the protagonist. To have a better understanding of his background, please visit his character biography in the RPG Headquarters. This story details his arrival to Earth and the adventures that he takes part in before his appearance in the official RPG (which may take a while due to the high amount of original characters waiting on the sidelines). Take note that Earth's continental formation is vastly different during the Beast Wars so I cannot tell you where exactly Orcariner is. However, just know that he's halfway across the world which is why his involvement in the Beast Wars has not occurred yet. Thanks for taking the time to read my story, and I appreciate and comments and/or criticism you may post. I will be posting each section of the story in this same topic so know that I shall be reading your replies and taking them into heavy consideration.

***AND NOW THE ACTUAL STORY***


Part 1: Arrivals



The sound of the crash would have been deafening to all life forms in the dark ocean except for the slumbering protoform that rested within the stasis pod. Bubbles furiously hissed from the superheated hull of the vessel as it sank to the bottom of the ocean. The shockwave of the impact had scattered most of the wildlife within the vicinity, and the night sky made it nearly impossible for any rescue attempt to track the landing zone. Further and further it sank towards the bottom of the ocean, with bubbles no longer furiously streaming from the cooling metal. The stasis pod was now just a dark object sinking indefinitely into an even darker world.

Alert: planetary energon radiation levels critical. Initiating DNA scan sequence for new alternative form.

A yellow ray of light illuminated the watery depths, slicing through whatever mystery that darkness tried to hide. The beam began to rotate around the massive pod, desperately searching for any organic life in order to prevent the destruction of the fragile spark within. Continuing its descent into the unknown, the Maximal protoform remained blissfully unaware of the impending danger should a new alternative form became unattainable. The crash had scared off the marine life and now there was nothing but the ocean. The scanners refused to surrender to the abyss, and maintained its rotating beacon of light. The pod that was once the haven of a critically damaged Maximal was beginning to transform into a prison. Without an animal form, the spark inside would be forced to continue its deep sleep until the vessel ran out of power. Only then, would the glowing orb be greeted by death’s cold embrace.

Alert: organic life detected. Assimilating DNA code into Maximal protoform.

As the light of the beacon dimmed, so did the faint shadows of the enigmatic creatures that approached the stasis pod. The protoform inside proceeded to morph into the organic life form chosen by the computer. Layers of hardening liquid metal enveloped the radiating spark: the spark whose life was now preserved.

Alert: security safeguards powering down. Pod hatch will now open.

Bubbles escaped the opened vessel as the ocean’s water began to flood inside. Everything felt cold. Everything felt wet. Feeling incredibly discomforted, the Maximal known as Orcariner flailed his body until he broke free from the containment. His scanners proceeded to boot up and for the first time since the battle in the stars, he felt aware of himself. Panic overcame the robotic alien as he realized that he was in water.

Escape!

Trying to flee the aquatic environment before the liquid could permanently damage his circuitry, Orcariner awkwardly shook his limbs out of sync with one another.

My arms! My legs!

Claustrophobia was overwhelming as he realized that his legs were bound together and his arms were severely limited in movement. The series of beeps continued to echo within his head as more and more scanners appeared on his user interface. The darkness slowly dissipated as his optics adjusted to its environment. Realtime readings replaced the overcrowded system scans giving him a live update on his system health, energy output, radar scans, and other data that seemed more familiar to him. Now able to see through the pitch black, Orcariner attempted to search himself but was faced with extreme difficulty as he tried to turn his head. Something felt wrong and the sensation of panic began to build again within his spark. Dark figures proceeded to swim around the lost Maximal. Temporarily forgetting about his physical bind, Orcariner focused his scanners on the life forms that swam around him. The massive creatures were roughly his size, and to his surprise, some were even larger. Sensing a trap from the circling predators, the robot tried to escape but his lack of mobility hindered his attempts.

“Identify physical state,” he quickly said.

An image of one of the aquatic animals that surrounded him appeared on his interface decorated with blue gridlines.

Form: Orcinus Orca, also known as the Killer Whale. Species first encountered by the Autobot faction in 1984.

Orcariner grimaced, “Not their physical state, I want a scan of mine.”

Present scan is of Maximal Orcariner.

The struggle stopped. The Maximal inspected the diagram on his interface, then looked towards the continuously circling group of killer whales. Looking down as far as he could, Orcariner discovered the reason as to why his arms lacked the mobility they once had before: they were now pectoral fins. That could only mean that the stasis pod’s DNA scanners picked up the orcinus orca species as his new alternative mode. It correlated to the fact that the Maximal’s circuits were now immune to the effects of water. Finally understanding the situation at hand, Orcariner moved his legs together in sync. The motion of his new tail sent the robot forward towards the rest of the pack of whales. Seeing him swim well for the first time, the pod of killer whales broke their protective formation and headed out in a single direction. Following suite, Orcariner imitated their form, trying to keep up with the more experienced swimmers.


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The green tint that masked his visual interface switched offline as the oceanic environment became more visible. The light above was strong enough to illuminate the marine life, both animal and plant. The Maximal deduced that only sunlight could be powerful enough to have such an effect, and therefore, the new day had arrived. With a better visual of his surroundings, Orcariner took notice of the ocean floor level steadily coming into view. Dry land must not be very far off, he thought. Soon enough, he found that he was correct. The pod of killer whales picked up the pace as they raced towards the beach head. Choosing to stay behind, the robotic whale observed the sudden aggressive nature of the group. Rising above water level, the beams of sunlight seared into Orcariner’s optics causing his sensors to readjust before a complete visual could be obtained. The orcas were hunting down animals registered as sea lions. The predators struck quick with fierce determination, and the water was dyed red from the effective maneuvers that were executed without fail. Orcariner could not help but admire the hunters for their proficiency, taking the prey off guard with unmatched power but with enough speed so that there would be no reaction but submission. That was something he had to keep in mind for the future, especially in an unknown world such as this. Enough learning, he thought, it was time for him to transform and move out. Swimming towards the beach, the robot finally unveiled himself to the world.

“Orcariner, maximize!”

The transformation that occurred caught the attention of both the feeding orca and the fleeing sea lions alike. The Maximal’s pectoral fins jetted out from his sides unveiling his freed arms with the fins protruding from his elbows. The tail split apart, swiveling upwards and rotating to allow his legs to finally extend with the flukes providing an aggressive appearance for his knees. The whale head bent forward as the body continued to open apart and bond together again. The Maximal’s true head rose with a cry of freedom, sending the animals fleeing in all directions from the transforming giant that walked from beneath the ocean. His red optics brightly glowing, Orcariner scanned his new environment as he left the water and felt the new sensation of sand. As much as he enjoyed learning to swim with his kindred life forms, the Maximal missed using his legs. He stretched his arms merrily and tested their mobility which surpassed the movement of the fins by far. The new black and white body looked foreign, but it felt exactly the same as his old one. Recalling how broken he was back on the Axalon during the battle, Orcariner actually thought this body worked even better.

Not willing to risk falling to a predator such as the sea lions had, the Maximal intended to learn the capabilities of his new form. Through unspoken command, the fins that protected his elbow joints swiveled forward and unsheathed large silver-blue blades. These were quite similarly fashioned after the old ones he had used before obtaining a beast form, but the serrated design seemed more…aquatically inspired. He did not mind the decoration as long as the weapons proved useful in close ranged combat. Reaching behind him, Orcariner found a carbine with an oval discharge port. Firing a few test shots at nearby palm trees, the Maximal found the weapon to be adequate, but he doubted that it would land any lethal blows to armored opponents. Against flesh predators, however, it was more than enough to keep him from getting scrapped. He latched the weapon onto his back once again. He preferred to use his melee weapons for they were quicker to unsheathe in the event of an ambush and much more dangerous. Once more, the memory of the killer whales ripping apart the horde of sea lions with only their bare teeth surfaced from his mind. Another memory arose, but this one was far more distant. Orcariner remembered his training back on Cybertron: his home. His mentor had taught him how to use not only bladed weaponry, but even his bare hands to take down his opponents. These were lessons that the Maximal will have to recall at a time such as this. His mind further wondered if his teacher would be looking for him once the Axalon was reported missing.

A deep, steady voice spoke, “You look lost, my friend.”

Orcariner snapped out of his reminiscent thoughts and unsheathed his wrist blades, readjusting his body into combat formation. He quickly scanned his surroundings towards the root location of where the voice originated from.

“I would calm down if I were you.”

Exiting the thick of the jungle several meters ahead of him, the marine Maximal caught sight of another robot of Cybertron design. The head of a snow leopard at his chest revealed the stranger’s beast form, and his stark white of his fur combined with his silvery secondary color gave him an illuminating presence. This individual barely reached the massive Orcariner’s waist, but despite his size, the figure was aiming a long and presumably powerful sniper rifle at his head. Logic told him to stand down and listen to what the stranger had to say, but the warrior’s passion for battle within yearned to engage the mysterious person.

“Identify yourself as Maximal or Predacon,” the male robot said.

Without hesitating, the larger being replied, “I’m Maximal. Name’s Orcariner, sentry of the Axalon.”

Lowering his weapon, the other robot smiled.

“My apologies for the aggression, my friend. My name is Ice Sight, and I served aboard the Axalon, as well. I believe I should thank Primus for our encounter with one another, for fellowship may be our salvation on this mysterious planet.”

Orcariner asked, “How did you get here?”

“The same way you did, I assume,” the fellow Maximal replied, “Via stasis pod. My vessel crashed into the mountainous line several clicks north from here. It is quite the walk and the climb, but it is a safe location nonetheless. Would you like to join me back at my newfound home? Only Primus knows what dangers stalk us out here in the wild.”

Orcariner did not have to consider this offer too long. Here was not only a fellow Maximal, but one who had served aboard the same ship he had. Perhaps if they put their memories together, the two of them may uncover where they are. Better yet, they may even find the rest of the Axalon crewmembers.

“Lead the way.”


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“That sounds like quite the rescue,” said Ice Sight, “And this ship mate did not reveal his name?”

Orcariner shook his head as his slashed through the thick plant life.

“Even if he did, my sound receptors were far too damaged to comprehend anything. The only memory I have is that he was green. He was a pretty big guy too.”

The feline Maximal replied, “Someone as large as you?”

“No,” said Orcariner, continuing to clear a path for the trek, “But the guy was pretty strong; strong enough to carry me all by himself.”

“Then one with such strength of heart, mind, and boy will surely survive the crash. You should thank him once you find him.”

Orcariner paused, “What makes you think the rest of the crew survived?”

“Faith,” said Ice Sight, kicking aside a fallen branch, “We were blessed to have survived a planetary crash inside a mere escape pod. I’m sure the Axalon will be more than enough protection for the remaining crew.”

So the Axalon did crash, the marine Maximal thought to himself. Of course, he should have thought about this before. The stasis pods would have never been ejected out of the ship unless if it had sustained heavy damage. The exploration vessel must have taken one too many shots from the Darksyde’s plasma cannons for the captain to take such drastic measures. This was especially true since they were carrying a special stasis…

“Blast!”

He stopped in his tracks. Ice Sight turned around and inquired.

“Is something wrong?”

Orcariner had completely forgotten about Protoform X. It was the very reason why he joined the Axalon’s crew in the first place, and not to mention that he desperately wanted to prove himself to his master by doing so. If the stasis pods were orbiting the planet and falling one by one through the atmosphere, Protoform X would surely arrive if he had not already. The giant Maximal lowered his head in disbelief at his failure. He solemnly relayed his story and mission to his comrade in arms. To his surprise, Ice Sight did not have any hint of panic in his eyes.

“Fear not, my friend,” he said, “I am sure that when the situation arrives we will deal with it accordingly. If your murderer is in orbit, we have nothing to fear. Should we come across him down here, we outnumber him.”

Orcariner liked his new companion. Any other Cybertron civilian would be unable to think as calmly and reasonably as this individual does. The snow leopard Maximal did not appear to be elderly, and yet his words echoed wisdom and patience. Looking through the dense jungle, the larger Maximal saw in the distance tall mountains covered with in a white blanket of snow. They would provide perfect camouflage for the cat, but a massive black and white individual such as himself would stand out. He knew that the smaller robot’s nimbleness far exceeded his, and that climbing such steep slopes would be far more difficult for Orcariner. Suddenly, a low hum resonated in the distance sending flocks of birds flying out of the trees.

Ice Sight growled, “Beast mode!”

The Maximal quickly transformed back into a large snow leopard and proceeded towards the location of the hum.

“Wait,” said Orcariner, following the quicker feline, “What is it?”

“I know that sound,” he replied, the humming increasing in pitch, “That’s a transwarp portal.”

Orcariner could not believe what he had just heard. Normally, technology of the sort was limited to space vessels approved only by the High Council. It stunned him just to imagine who or what could be using a terrain based one to travel by foot.

“Back on the Axalon,” continued the snow leopard, “I was the hardware engineer for various propulsion systems: primary engines, auxiliary generators, and even the transwarp drive. As a matter of fact, I was one of the engineers who helped installed the transwarp stabilizer. That’s how I know that sound from the test runs back on Cybertron!”

Trying to catch his breath as his smashed through the branches and trees, Orcariner asked his friend.

“Do you, ugh,” a branch hit him in hit mouth, “Do you think that could be a rescue team?”

“Negative,” came the swift reply, “Only certain registered vehicles have transwarp drives and those are flight based vehicles. Whoever’s coming on land must have stolen this technology, and I intend to bring them to justice!”

A sudden shock overwhelmed Orcariner’s body and the metallic giant fell over and crashed onto the jungle floor. Electric currents flashed across him and sparks fired aggressively from his circuitry. Ice Sight quickly stopped in his tracks and turned towards the larger Maximal.

“You have been exposed to the energon build up for too long. You must return to your beast mode.”

Reluctantly, he complied. The fallen giant transformed back into a killer whale and rested on the ground trying to catch his breath. It quickly dawned to him that being a marine based animal would be quite the disadvantage in a situation such as this. His recovery systems were recharging his robot form and the whale was helpless.

“No worries, my friend,” whispered Ice Sight, “We are near the portal. See for yourself.”

Looking up the best he could, Orcariner noticed through the bushes that a brilliant blue orb of light was generating in a clearing at the edge of the jungle. It was located outside of the tree line near a wide river.

“If only I can get to the water,” whispered Orcariner.

“No time,” his friend replied, “Look.”

A large robotic figure arose from the portal with a gust of wind following his arrival. Despite being mechanical, the two Maximals could see the intensive muscle definition that ripped through the stranger’s body. The massive horns that protruded from his head provided a powerful presence as he scanned his surroundings. He looked very familiar, but Orcariner could not recall where he had seen the robot before. The stranger took a few steps and looked back into the still opened transwarp portal. The killer whale noticed that the tall figure had somehow already acquired a beast form of his own as the energon radiation did not strike his robot mode as quickly as it should have. The short fur on his shoulders and back as well as the menacing horns hinted that the alternative mode must have been a bull of some sort. Ice Sight narrowed his eyes, and Orcariner could tell that his more experienced friend had a bad feeling about this new guest. The stranger finally spoke into his com-link.

“Tantrum to Razorclaw, the portal’s connection is secure. You may proceed.”

Posted: Tue Aug 18, 2009 4:20 am
by Alak
Part 2: Discoveries



The killer whale Maximal felt more alert from hearing the names of the new arrivals. The familiarity made sense to him now and he hissed towards his companion, hoping to grab his attention without alerting the newcomers. Ice Sight turned towards the helpless giant and silently approached him.

Orcariner whispered, “We’re dealing with Decepticons!”

“Are you sure?” asked the snow leopard.

“Absolutely,” replied the whale, “I’ve read their histories in the Maximal archives. Razorclaw and his team survived the Great War and underwent the same upgrade that turned our ancestors into the Maximals and Predacons we are now.”

Ice Sight growled, “Stay here where you are out of sight. I’ll be back”

Orcariner began to ask but feline was already out of sight. The larger robot cursed his new comrade for being so quick and refocused his attention towards the still active transwarp portal several meters in front of him through the bushes. The large ox-like Predacon stood aside and a several more large figures walked through. All of them were massive in their own right, and judging from the confidence of their stances, Orcariner believed they would all be difficult to defeat even individually. Apart from their size and obvious alternative forms, the Predacons looked a bit different from when they were part of the Decepticon faction. Razorclaw, the leader, was easy to pick out due to the fierce lion’s head that shielded his chest. He was speaking quietly to the rest of his team, possibly suspecting the presence of Maximal spies. Great, Orcariner thought, he was a smart fellow, too. Bringing up the recharge meter onto his user interface, the whale was disappointed to see that he was only at a mere 13%. Should the enemy spot him, the Maximal would barely last more than a few cycles in robot mode.

“The readings are consistent,” said one of the larger figures, “We should be on the same planet as Primal and his crew.”

Razorclaw paused, “Regardless, I have zero intention of searching an entire world for him. Prepare the satellite immediately and pinpoint the location of the Axalon. Report back to me in twenty cycles on your progress. In the meantime, I want Divebomb to scout the vicinity. Check your visual for both Predacon and Maximal signatures. No surprise attacks!”

The Predacon being referred to in that last command quickly transformed into a large bird-like creature and shot up into the sky. Orcariner sighed in disappointment. He absolutely hated fliers since they were nearly impossible for someone like him to defeat single-handedly. At least Divebomb was going to be gone for a while, hopefully long enough for him and Ice Sight to handle the ground based soldiers. Pulling up the recharge meter again, he was that the auto recovery process was frustratingly slow as it only increased to 14%. Using his fins and tail to the best of his ability, Orcariner moved himself closer to the bushes inch by inch. Razorclaw seemed to be conversing with Tantrum, the bull inspired Predacon.

“With the removal of Primal, the future will shape into our favor,” spoke Razorclaw.

“And what of the other Maximal generals?” asked Tantrum.

“For every ace the Maximals have, we have one of our own to counter with. This Megatron and Optimus Primal are the polarities of one another, maintaining the scale’s balance in the quiet struggle between our factions. By taking Primal out of the picture before he can develop into a Maximal ‘hero’, the scale will be tipped in our favor over time leading to Predacon rule by the time we return home.”

Orcariner was extremely confused. He understood that transwarp drives allowed individuals to cross the barriers of space and time, which meant that these Predacons were futuristic versions of themselves. However, he was lost within their scheme to remove Primal since that Maximal was just a young captain of an exploration ship. If he was also ship wrecked on this planet, how could Optimus play any significant role in Cybertron’s future? Before he could continue his contemplation, a voice boomed from somewhere in the jungle.

“Not on my watch, Predacon!”

A loud pang echoed and the killer whale noticed something strike into Tantrum’s left shoulder. The mighty Predacon roared in pain as his body involuntarily spun around and crashed into the sand. Orcariner could see a relatively large hole in the downed robot’s shoulder joint with sparks violently flying from the wound.

“We are under attack!” yelled their leader, “Predacons! Mobilize!”

To the whale’s surprise, Razorclaw unsheathed his own blades from his wrist guards. Unlike Orcariner’s own melee weapons, this opponent had three elongated claws extending from each arm. More and more bullets whizzed by, and the transwarp drive was quickly torn apart from the hail of projectiles. Sensing his opponent was a sniper, Razorclaw punched in a text code into his wrist communicator. The leader the displayed alarming speed as he slashed forward and struck down the .50 caliber bullet before it impaled his chest. His teammate, Rampage, was not as fortunate as both of his laser rifles exploded in his hands from Ice Sight’s precise shots. The Predacons jumped out of the way as more projectiles were fired in their direction. The scanner that they were building was blown in half and toppled uselessly to the ground. Suddenly, an explosion erupted several hundred meters into the jungle. Orcariner tried to turn to see where it had occurred, but his beast form would not allow his head to move so flexibly. He heard the sound of wings far above him as Divebomb appeared from the sky and descending onto the riverbank where both the scanner and transwarp drive were in shambles.

“What’s the status?” asked Razorclaw, recovering from the attack.

“I hit him with a carpet bomb,” replied the flier, “I doubt he’ll be troubling us anymore.”

“Even so, I want his remains,” growled the leader, “There’s nothing for us here now. Let us move into the wild.”

Orcariner’s spark burned with anger from hearing the flier speak of his friend’s death. Despite his emotions, the Maximal could not afford to set aside logic. Engaging all five of these Predacons would be a suicidal attempt and Ice Sight would have died in vain. The team was mobilizing and the whale had to think through this situation fast. His best chance of survival was entering the river, but doing so would mean having to fight past Razorclaw and his Predacons. Pulling up the meter once again, he found his recharge progress at 16%. Even a short push through the enemy line would completely drain his energy to the point that he would have to revert to beast mode before entering the river. That would only place him in the same disposition he was in now but it was a chance he had to take. The Maximal recalled the pod of killer whales attacking the sea lions back at the beach. They were quick, they were precise, and they were successful. He needed to be all of those things right now.

“Orcariner,” he yelled, “Maximize!”

The transforming giant charged through the bushes shouting the cry of war as he unleashed his metallic blades. Orcariner rammed both of the weapons into Rampage’s torso before any of the Predacons could react. Divebomb was the quickest to draw his rifle and began to unload a barrage of particle beams unto the revealed Maximal. Orcariner heel-toed and used his victim as a shield, and the tiger robot roared in pain as the beams struck his back. Becoming an extremely heavy burden to carry, the Maximal dropped his body shield and began to sprint towards the river. Razorclaw leapt in from of him with ease and struck forward with such ferocity that the similarly sized Orcariner barely had any time to deflect the blow. The two traded strikes and parries, but time was quickly running out. Rather than counter the Predacon’s next attack, the Maximal chose to sidestep it and continued running. A sharp pain ran up his spine as Divebomb fired a beam at the fleeing target from behind.

“Beast mode!” cried the Predacon named Headstrong.

The robot transformed into a rhinoceros and slammed into Orcariner’s side. The Maximal cried out as he felt his body lift into the air and then uncomfortably crash onto a rocky surface. That last assault was too much for his robot form as electric currents surged throughout his body. The pain was unbearable and he found himself immobilized from the energon overload. The water only spread the burn as it softly slide across his body, accenting the electrical shocks. Then, through the pain, it instantly occurred to him. Water! Using every ounce of his remaining strength, Orcariner used his right arm to push himself even further into the river. Alas, a large shadow was cast over him and Razorclaw sent his foot painfully crashing onto the Maximal’s chest plate.

“I cannot allow you to be so fortunate,” he said, “You and your friend attacked us with lethal intent. Allow me to return the favor.”

The Predacon leader raised his claws, ready to land the killing blow and send his foe’s spark back to the Matrix. A sudden cry of surprise came from behind him, and Razorclaw turned around in time to see a large snow leopard pounce on top of Divebomb, tearing his claws into the thick armor and circuitry. Using his enemy’s hesitation to his advantage, Orcariner transformed back into his beast mode. The shifting body parts threw the Predacon off balance, allowing Ice Sight to tackle the much larger feline robot to the ground.

“Swim!” he ordered.

The killer whale flailed as hard as he could despite of the aching pain that still resonated inside of his body. The bank was getting deeper and the rushing current picked up the Maximal’s smooth, rubbery body. Leaving his downed opponent in a hurry, the snow leopard sprinted towards the river and leapt onto Orcariner’s back.

“I thought you were dead!” yelled the whale.

Transforming back into his robot mode, Ice Sight replied, “Thank Primus, as he has been most kind to my fate.”

He aimed his sniper rifle and fired a single shot at Divebomb before returning to his beast mode. The flier screeched as his left wing was crippled from the powerful shot. Now being unable to pursue the Maximals, Razorclaw could do nothing but glare through his red visor as his new enemies swam away down the river. Should they ever cross paths again, the Predacon leader would have his revenge.


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The water current began to slow down as the river descended in elevation. The odd scene of a feline predator sitting on top of a killer whale did not appear to deter any of the jungle’s wild life. No longer swimming in such a hurry, the marine animal was serene and allowed the river to choose where he would go and how fast he would be taken there. The snow leopard on his back was equally at peace, nursing his wounds from the battle a megacycle ago. Ever since the escape, both of the robotic animals spent the trip in silence. Both of them spent the trip contemplating about their predicament.

“We have to send them back,” said Orcariner, breaking the quiet atmosphere.

Ice Sight replied, “Your reason?”

“They’re from the future,” said the orca, “I heard Razorclaw’s plan to disrupt the time continuum by killing our ship’s captain. Who knows, if we kill them we might be interfering with time, as well.”

“Interesting theory,” said the leopard, “But the future is always going to be written in situ. Changing it does not have the severity of consequences as changing the past.”

“Maybe, but if we fought them by ourselves we will still lose without a doubt. The Predacons have more numbers, more firepower, and more muscle. I think I can overpower Razorclaw, but not more than one Predacon at a time.”

“Do you suggest a trap?”

“Yes,” said Orcariner with confidence, “They don’t have a way off this planet except through the transwarp drive.”

“The same transwarp drive I destroyed,” reminded Ice Sight.

“True, but I’m sure we can fix it ourselves. You said you specialized in engines and warp drives back on the Axalon. I’m trained to be capable at basic engineering, and I’ve seen schematics of several transwarp drives in the databases. A Predacon sized one can’t be that much different.”

The cat thought about this proposition, “So by fixing and reactivating the portal, we draw them to us. I foresee two problems. What makes you think they will be willing to return to their time before accomplishing their mission objective? Also, what makes you think they will not kill us upon seeing their former attackers?”

“Well,” said the whale, “I’m still working on it.”

“Primus help us if there is a way to succeed,” whispered the older Maximal.

The two floated for several more cycles in silence. Orcariner knew it would be a personal subject but felt compelled to ask.

“Hey, Ice Sight?”

“Yes.”

“Why do you always talk about him?” asked Orcariner.

“Who?”

“Primus. You’re always asking him for help or thanking him for everything you do,” Orcariner already felt this would turn into an awkward conversation, “Why…I mean…what exactly do you say those things for?”

The snow leopard chuckled and sighed.

“I give Primus my thanks because I am grateful for everything he does for me. I ask him for strength because he gives it to me. I seek guidance from him because I know he will lay down the road for me.”

The younger Maximal cocked his brow, “That doesn’t really make a whole lot of sense.”

“What would you like me to clarify?”

Orcariner hesitated, afraid to offend his friend, “Well, I know that Primus was the creator of the Autobots and so forth, but ultimately, he’s just a supercomputer. He can’t exactly hear you when you…um…speak out to him, especially across space and time.”

“Oh, but he can,” smiled Ice Sight, “Primus is the creator of all transformers, not just the Autobots. Every time a spark enters our universe, it comes from Primus himself. Therefore, we all carry a part of him inside ourselves everywhere we go.”

“I guess,” said the whale, wearily, “But if I gave you my fin, it’s not going to be able to hear anything you say when you’re about to get slagged.”

Laughing at the analogy, Ice Sight replied, “No, I’m not talking about his body being with us. I’m referring to his spirit.”

“Now your words are going straight over my head.”

“Think about your spark, my friend. When your body was crippled in the Axalon, the Maximal who saved you placed it into a new protoform. Yet, when you rose from your stasis pod, you were the same as you were before. Core processors, hard drives, and analytical software are always going to be replaceable. Your spark, on the other hand, cannot. This is because Primus created each spark to be different, and his essence within your spark is what gave it life. That is why when you pass away, your spark returns to the Matrix unlike the rest of your body. It returns to its creator.”

Orcariner had read the databanks on Primus and the Matrix, but never before had he thought of any significant ties that bound him to them. Primus was just a folklore used in figures of speech. He had heard of sparks returning to the Matrix but never truly believed these stories as nothing more than myths. The Maximal had always assumed that sparks were created by previous generations of transformers and were merely extinguished when the host was deceased.

“You make a good point,” said the killer whale, “but I still don’t see how Primus can give you strength. Almost seems like a futile prayer if you ask me.”

“Is it?” asked the snow leopard, “The spark is the core of your body. It gives you life. It gives you the strength to survive. With Primus’ essence living within each of our sparks, he can grant us the power to overcome our obstacles if we ask for it.”

Orcariner chuckled, “I wonder how often the late Megatron prayed for power every time he fought Optimus Prime.”

“Even if he did, I doubt it lacked sincerity. Primus is the harbinger of life. To seek his power in order to destroy the sentient life he created would be to ravage everything the god stood for.”

The young Maximal was impressed with his comrade’s answers. What was even more impressive was how calm and collected Ice Sight seemed in his replies. He really was confident in his faith, and his patience was astounding despite Orcariner questioning…no…challenging everything the feline stood for. Never before had the Maximal seen such devotion, and even the databases failed to relay the significance that a being such as Primus held over the transformer race. The killer whale prided himself in preventing nonsensical propaganda from affecting his judgment, but something about what the leopard said simply made sense. Orcariner began to feel like a fool for believing his friend without researching the matter even further. Yet, there were no databases around. There were no references, texts, nor libraries for him to access; only his own mind. It was his mind that seemed to run awry from trying to comprehend everything Ice Sight had just told him within the past few cycles. Trying to break away from his internal struggle, the killer whale decided to move onto something else to change his focus.

“We should probably head back upstream if we want to catch their attention before they head off too far into the jungle.”

“Agreed, my friend,” said the snow leopard, laying down and closing his eyes.

Posted: Wed Aug 19, 2009 12:46 am
by Blazemane
Very interesting work so far.

There are a few grammatical things I noticed, if you don't mind me pointing them out.
Dry land must not be very far off, he thought.
As internal dialogue, this should be italicized to let the reader know Ocariner is establishing something for himself, rather than the narrator affirming it. By the same token, I'm not entirely certain if this is true, but I think even internal dialogue begins a new paragraph (though I could be wrong, and you started paragraphs with new speakers in your story quite impressively).
The exploration vessel must had taken one too many shots...
You know this of course, and simply made a typo, but "had" should be replaced with "have".
and Orcariner could tell that his more experience
"Experience" should be replaced with "experienced".

There might have been more things, but I wasn't correcting as I read- not nearly as much fun that way. Anyways, this story really is quite grammatically sound- or pointing out the few things I noticed would not be worth the effort.

Anyways, I like the plot idea you're going with here- bringing in a new faction of Predacons to assassinate Primal.

Also, the manner in which you wrote the story, although focused on your original character, seemed to place the stress off of him, and more on what was going on around him, which made the story well worth reading. Not that character centered works can't be good too. But, this style worked for this story.

On the note of the character of Ocariner, Ice Sight is a very nice foil to him. At least in terms of fighting style and belief systems. I was very intrigued by your decision to have Ice Sight rooted in faith. I can think of only one other specific writer (7KnightWolf), and perhaps a second who chose to make that a centerpiece of any of their works (but I'm not a very accomplished fan fiction reader, so anyone who reads this and has focused on faith, sorry).

I sense that the pondering which will occur over faith will become as much of an important plot line to you in the upcoming chapters as the foiling of the Predacons. I also kinda' sense a death on the way. But I could be wrong.

Anyways, great job on this story- quite interesting.

Posted: Wed Aug 19, 2009 1:52 am
by Alak
:D Huzzah for another grammar lover! You have no idea how grateful I am for you to point those mistakes out for me. I wrote both parts late at night and was pretty sure that I made mistakes somewhere. Seeing how you take it pretty seriously, do you write any fanfics of your own? The only recent topic I found was the review system one. Oh, and I intentionally left the internal dialogue in mid-paragraph and chose not to italicize. I forget why I did that, but I'll change that from here on out.

Thanks for also noticing the foil. Ice Sight was my first OC from another BW forum that I intended to introduce in your RPG. However, due to the "no more cats" rule, I created Orcariner with the intention of making him the complete opposite (faction excluded lol). Again, thanks for the comment it really got my heart pumping when I saw someone actually replied lol!

Posted: Wed Aug 19, 2009 2:13 am
by Blazemane
it really got my heart pumping when I saw someone actually replied lol!
I totally react that way too. It's like "oh my goodness... oh my goodness... oh my goodness!"
Seeing how you take it pretty seriously, do you write any fanfics of your own?
Yeah, I do.

My first fiction was for an adventure contest on this site back in April 2007- just a one shot about Cheetor and a virus... and such things.

But I have two ongoing series right now- one simply titled the Serengeti Series, which really is supposed to get its name from the setting I was hoping it could focus on, but it has turned into a recounting of the events of the theft of the Golden Disk, with some O.C.'s involved. The Golden Disk story was meant to be more of a background for the O.C.'s, and in a way, it still is, but writing stories about the Golden Disk has become quite fun. I just have one more part of one last chapter, and I'll finally be away from Cybertron.

Then I'm also working on a Terminator/Beast Wars crossover (entitled Time Chords) in which Cheetor gets sent to Earth to ensure that the events of the Beast Wars had no adverse effects on Earth itself- and in the process gets stranded in the war against Skynet.

That one is a lot of fun to write.

Anyways, you certainly don't have to read them, but if you were interested, they're in my fan fiction page on bwint.net's archive. I can post the links to the threads in the console if you want me to, but I have to go to bed right now.

Posted: Wed Aug 19, 2009 2:51 pm
by Alak
Beast Wars and Terminator? Especially Cheetor of all characters lol. I think I'll look it up through the search bar. Wait, which generation are you using for Cheetor, Beast Wars or Beast Machines?

Posted: Wed Aug 19, 2009 3:23 pm
by Blazemane
Beast Wars and Terminator? Especially Cheetor of all characters lol. I think I'll look it up through the search bar. Wait, which generation are you using for Cheetor, Beast Wars or Beast Machines?
I hope I haven't hijacked your story thread. I kind of say things long-windedly.

Well, there's a reason behind it being Cheetor. See, as tough as Terminators are to humans, they are still not invincible. They always die in the movies anyways. But I think their "unstoppable" presence seems relative to whatever weaponry is around. So, in the movies, they go back in time, and they only have to deal with bullets- easily attainable bullets too- whatever can be acquired quickly by the defenders while they're on the run from the attacker. But in the beginning of Terminator 2, when the future is shown, and humans are having a war with a bunch of different terminators, you can actually see that the humans stand a chance with plasma weaponry. They aren't quite on the same footing, but the war turns into a much more tactical affair. The resistance isn't just falling to brute strength anymore.

So, in my opinion, Cybertronians would be able to rock terminators. They have alien weapon technology, and if they get down to hand to hand fighting, at least they can't get their necks snapped in under 2 seconds.

Having any of the stronger characters running around, like Depth Charge for instance, just wouldn't be as much fun to write. "You're dead. You're dead. You're dead."

Cheetor, on the other hand, isn't renowned for firepower. Besides that, he seems, being a fast scout and all, more likely to have been picked on Cybertron to go to Earth as an emissary. And, since this takes place some time after Beast Wars, I think he would have matured a bit by then, and I kinda' want to see how the normally immature character, even having grown quite a bit, would react in a desperate world, especially with no one else of his kind there to consult. Although, I haven't delved too much into that.

Anyways, he's Beast Wars Cheetor. I kinda' just let Beast Machines not exist, but didn't specify it. And actually, since I though he would want to keep as low of a profile returning to Earth as possible, I thought he would revert back to his season one form- to look like an actual cheetah instead of a mechanical mutant (a cool one- don't get me wrong- but still out of place on Earth).

Boy, I have ranted. How's your third chapter going?

Posted: Wed Aug 19, 2009 3:32 pm
by Alak
lol no worries, I'm just glad there is a conversation in this thread. I just finished reading Time Chords Chapter 1 and it's really good! I did sort of get the feeling that it was Season 1 Cheetor, but I'm glad you confirmed it.

As for the 3rd chapter, I haven't started writing it, but I have planned it out. I'll most likely write it tonight, proofread it tomorrow, and then post it.

Posted: Wed Aug 19, 2009 3:58 pm
by Blazemane
I just finished reading Time Chords Chapter 1 and it's really good!
Thanks! Edit: I just looked at that chapter and realized the page breaks weren't there. Must have copied it from fanfiction.net and forgotten to add the asteriks in. The fanfiction.net lines don't work on this forum. So sorry if there was random jumping around in the story.
As for the 3rd chapter, I haven't started writing it, but I have planned it out. I'll most likely write it tonight, proofread it tomorrow, and then post it.
O.k. :)

Posted: Wed Aug 19, 2009 9:15 pm
by Alak
Couldn't help but notice the post date for Chapter 3 was back in April. Are you gonna finish the series or have you moved on? Anyhoo, I guess I'll start Part 3 now lol...

Posted: Wed Aug 19, 2009 11:32 pm
by Blazemane
Yeah, I intend to continue.

My fictions are generally written slowly. I'm trying to work out specific plot points. What I've written of the 4th chapter so far just doesn't seem... right. Plus somebody's borrowing my copy of Terminator 2, and I want to review something specifically.

Posted: Thu Aug 20, 2009 6:08 pm
by Tor
Hey, I don't mean to interupt, but I just wanted to tell Alak here that this is one good story. I'm reading it slowly (partly because I'm only getting about thirty minutes of computer time because school kicked up again) but I like what I've read so far. The detail and apparent research on the beast forms make this a real find. I'll keep reading if you keep writing. :wink:

Posted: Fri Aug 21, 2009 5:45 am
by Alak
^ Thanks, Tor! Anyways, sorry it took a while and sorry I'm posting this so late. I haven't actually proofread this yet, but I'm posting it anyways. I may make edits later on, but it'll only be grammatical corrections. Here's the 3rd and final part to this story, enjoy:




Part 3: Returns




“It appears we were lucky.”

Ice Sight noted the remains of the transwarp portal and Predacon satellite dish as he jumped off his companion’s back onto dry land. The sand stuck to his heavy paws due to the water slicked back of the killer whale, and so he transformed into his robot form before inspecting the scene. Orcariner followed suite as he emerged from the green river towards the bank. Several cycles prior to their arrival on land, the whale spent quite some time hidden underneath the currents, using his long range scanners to spot any Predacons while his companion waited in the bushes several meters south. Just two megacycles before that, the Maximals had launched their surprise attack on the new arrivals and therefore, it would not be surprising should the enemy be willing to do the same. Orcariner lifted the two parts of the broken ring that once formed the transwarp drive. Several of the wires hung loose, singed and severed from Ice Sight’s sniper rifle. Preventing the enemy’s escape was a good tactical advantage in warfare, but perhaps, now in hindsight, it had not been such a good idea.

“That gun of yours packs quite a punch,” the towering Maximal said out loud.

Ice Sight set down the equipment he had been inspecting and approached his friend.

“My apologies,” he replied, “What’s the extent of the damage?”

“I was hoping you could tell me. I can cut the useless ends off and rewire some of the cables, but my knowledge on the actual data cards inside is pretty limited. I figured since this was right up your ally back on the Axalon, you could try to restore them to the best of your abilities.”

“Will do,” the smaller robot replied, “I’ll have to verify that the processors are still functional, otherwise I may have to reinstall the executable boot files directly from my own memory banks.”

Orcariner nodded, although not entirely sure what such an action would exactly entail.

“What’d you find out about the scanner system?” he asked.

“The dish is broken beyond repair,” replied Ice Sight, “But that hardware is only important if we were to achieve feedback over an intercontinental distance. The primary drives are intact but you will have to build a new structure to stabilize the device and the beam.”

The task sounded easy enough and the two immediately began to engage their respective projects. Collecting scattered sheets of metal, including plates he was sure that belong to the tiger Rampage, Orcariner utilized his immense physical strength to bend them around the vulnerable internal hardware. A forked electric shocker emerged from one of his fingers and sparked several jolts at the overlaps. The heat from the currents was barely enough to meld the sheets together, but at least they would hold long enough for one scanner beam to operate for a few cycles.

“How’s your progress?” asked Orcariner.

“Going smoothly, my friend,” came the reply, “I believe the transwarp drive should be finished in less time than we initially predicted.”

This was good news. The large Maximal looked at the nearly complete scanner system in front of him. While the patchwork was a bit sloppy, it was more than adequate enough to get the job done. He felt a bit awkward completing his task before Ice Sight, especially since that meant he would be sitting around unproductively while the feline was working on a much more complicated project. He tried to think of a conversation topic that would help pass the time while he added some unnecessary touches, but none really came to mind. While intriguing, the previous topic they discussed was a bit overwhelming for the whale and he was not in the mood to open that door again.

“So what did you do before our fateful mission?” asked Ice Sight.

Startled by the question at first, Orcariner quickly felt relieved that his companion initiated the conversation.

“Well,” he paused, trying to dig into his memories of Cybertron, “I wasn’t working anything full time, if that’s what you’re asking. Just a bunch of side jobs and personal endeavors to fill the time…you know.”

“Such as?” asked the other robot, closing a finished section of the drive and then opening another one.

“I tried filling in security duty at a spaceport station. That only lasted about a half a deca-cycle before I got bored. I traveled to some moons and picked up a couple mining shifts but the shafts were too depressing for me.”

Ice Sight chuckled, “Rained down on your optimism?”

He laughed, “Just a bit, yeah. Everyone always called it a dead end job, so I quit.”

“What were you waiting for?”

“I’m sorry?”

“What were you waiting for?” the feline repeated, “You did not like the idea of mining for the rest of your life, so what were you waiting for? What was your calling?”

Orcariner was confused, “I’m not sure. I was just filling in time I guess. I suppose I thought I still had a shot at becoming a Peace Marshall.”

“Now that’s something new,” said Ice Sight, merrily, “I do not believe you mentioned that in your brief history. When did this dream begin?”

Orcariner smiled, “Well, it began ever since I was created. I was a big bot, always have been. All of the other young ones were intimidated by my size, so I used it to my advantage and scared off the bullies that picked on the smaller bots. I eventually did join the IPM Academy, you know. The induction ceremony was probably the happiest day of my life.”

“What happened?”

“With what?”

“An Imperial Peace Marshall does not usually aspire to become a miner. Something must have steered you off track.”

“Oh, yeah,” the larger Maximal replied, “Well, my mentor happened. Something bad happened one day and he left without saying anything. Went missing for over four stellar-cycles.”

Ice Sight nodded, “And he left you behind. What was his reason?”

“Have you heard of what happened to the colony called Omicron?”

“Ah,” the feline replied, raising a circuit board with understanding, “So your mentor was Depth Charge. That explains why you know a lot for your age, he must have been an unparalleled teacher.”

“The best, if you ask me,” said Orcariner, finishing the scanner repairs, “Then again, he was the only teacher I really ever knew. I could have never afforded living abroad like the other students, so he’d actually come to Cybertron often to pick me up to take me on some easy, low profile missions.”

“Well, you should thank Primus for your predicament. Had you lived on Omicron, you may have fallen victim to the Maximal that rampaged the colony.”

There it was again, the whole being-grateful-for-Primus ideology that Ice Sight was so fond of. Yet, he had a point right there. Orcariner had never looked at his past in that perspective, always assuming that had he been on Omicron with his mentor the outcome might have changed. Perhaps he should see the situation more gratefully than regretfully.

“So did you ever see him again?”

“My mentor?”

“Yes.”

“Just once. When he returned with the criminal in chains, I was present at the post-hearing. There was neither fond reminiscence nor catching up; none of that really. He was just…filled with so much anger that was intermingled with sadness. I found it quite difficult to approach him, really. There on the vast steps of the Council Citadel, my idol stood and all I could do was stare at him with pity.”

“Not many of us can relate to that extremity of pain,” said the smaller robot, solemnly, “Is that why you took it upon yourself to protect the stasis pod of Protoform X? To ensure that you mentor’s hard work would not go to waste, or is it because you wanted to elevate yourself in his eyes once again?”

Orcariner walked over and sat down in the sand near the transwarp drive, “I suppose both. Look how that turned out.”

“You make the mistake of idolizing him. Regardless of his reputation and actions, your mentor is still a Maximal like you and I. He is capable of allowing his emotions to control him, maybe even to the point of no return. Try as you may, but your successes will never restore the lives of those killed on Omicron, nor will you ever recover his sense of absolute defeat on that fateful day.”

Feeling defensive, he replied, “You practically idolize Primus don’t you?”

“Yes, but there is a difference, my friend,” Ice Sight replied, smiling, “Primus is a God, the victor in the fight against evil, the creator of all transformers, and the light that allows my spark to shine no matter where in space or time I should be. Your mentor, on the other hand, is nothing but a mortal who is consumed by memories of death and relentless destruction. He is not with you here, but Primus is and it is because of him that we are fortunate as we are to be alive even against seemingly insurmountable odds.”

Orcariner smiled, “Sounds good, but my teach’ is going to slag you when I tell him you said that.”

Laughing, Ice Sight stood up and closed the final panel on the transwarp drive. It was finally complete, and all they had left to do was lure the Predacons back to the river. The scanner that Orcariner had just finished repairing fiercely rattled, but the transparent sensor beam fired into the sky and unleashed what appeared to be a wispy shockwave. Several cycles passed by as the two Maximals stared at the console screen waiting for the receiver to pick up information. A blip appeared in the form a Predacon icon. Two cycles later, four more blips appeared on screen within the same proximity as the first one. They noted that their opponents had only managed to travel a little over two kilometers on foot, most likely due to the injuries they had sustained during the last encounter.

“My sniper rifle is capable of reaching them,” growled Ice Sight, “But not through the jungle. They obviously travel by foot, so perhaps I can catch up and provoke them enough to lead them back here.”

Orcariner replied, “No way, I’m not letting you fight five Predacons all by yourself!”

“I have no intention of fighting them. I am merely drawing their attention, my friend. Furthermore, my beast form is the faster one between the both of us and should you become overwhelmed with energon radiation, you shall be an absurdly easy target. It is not difficult to spot a killer whale stranded in the middle of the jungle.”

“Curse you and your wisdom,” said Orcariner turning back to the river, “Fine, I’ll wait in river for your signal.”

Entering the water, he returned to beast form and quickly swam to the bottom. The crocodiles and fish scattered from the behemoth and soon the river was clear. He preferred it that way, since distractions would only aggravate his nerves. Earlier, the whale had told his comrade that he would be able to fight Razorclaw and win. Now his confidence was a bit slacking as memories of the last match emerged. The memory of his opponent standing over his immobile body, ready to extinguish his spark echoed.

Nonsense, I had energon interference, Orcariner told himself.

This time, the aquatic warrior will be fresh from the start. Doubts continued to linger, however. Many scenarios crossed his mind and none of them ended in a Maximal victory. What if Ice Sight didn’t make it back alive? What if Orcariner had to face more than one individual at a time? What if his body did not function properly and the energon field leaves him at a disadvantage again? What if the transwarp drive didn’t even work? So many things that can go wrong, and the fact that it was a two versus five battle made him all the more nervous. Unfortunately, there was nothing he could do as of now but wait. Closing his eyes, the orca recalled the ferocity of the killer whales striking the sea lions with indomitable force. It was becoming a favorite memory of his on this planet, and he could use all the inspiration he could muster before this fight.

Rise from the tides and strike without hesitation and without mercy, but strike with precision, he thought.

He replayed the memory over and over again, because all he could do was wait.


---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


“You ready, my friend?” came a voice inside his head.

Orcariner opened his eyes, “Where are you?”

“I just arrived on the beach and I am about to reactivate the transwarp drive.”

“Alright, I’m…”

“You stay hidden!” said Ice Sight, hurriedly, “Only emerge on my signal when the Predacons arrive!”

He began to feel his spark energize with anticipation. It was overwhelmingly frustrating being unable to see anything up on land, but he used his friend’s infinite patience as an inspiration. A loud pang was muffled from above and it sounded two more times. It was the familiar sound of Ice Sight’s signature weapon, but unfortunately, being a sniper rifle, it did not indicate how near the enemy was.

Primus, help us, Orcariner thought.

He suddenly felt like a fool for even having that thought. The snow leopard’s personality was rubbing off on him. His attention was quickly redirected to a bright, blue glare from the river bank. Ice Sight must as activated the transwarp drive. The killer whale was tempted to transform into robot mode to prepare for the inevitable assault, but logic told him that he would need to save all of the energy he could.

“Now!”

With a roar, the mighty Orcariner burst from the water yelling “Maximize!” as he charged the river bank with both blades deployed. He rose just in time to see Ice Sight fire two dart rockets into the face of the swooping Divebomb. The Predacon cried out in agony as he crashed into the ground and inadvertently rolled into the radiant portal. Now the odds were two against four, which were much preferable especially with the flier out of the way. Orcariner leaped into the air over Ice Sight’s head and brought down both of his weapons down onto the attacking Tantrum’s shoulders. The Predacon cried out in shock as his opponent’s blades severed both of his arms with ease.

“Surprise,” the Maximal growled.

From the jungle, a large tiger and rhinoceros charged through the bushes and were shocked to find their dismembered teammate screaming in pain.

“Rampage, terrorize!” snarled the tiger.

The rhinoceros did the same, “Headstrong, terrorize!”

As they transformed, Tantrum opted to improvise and charged towards Orcariner head first with his massive horns aimed forward. The larger Maximal grabbed the horns and threw the Predacon to the ground and swung around just in time to slash Rampage across the chest with his left blade. The orange robot fell to his knees and a shot from Ice Sight’s rifle sent him somersaulting backwards into the sand face first. Suddenly, a bright light overcame both of the Maximals. As it dimmed, Orcariner and Ice Sight were surprised to find Headstrong standing behind them and the transwarp portal.

“How is this possible?” asked the feline.

With a roar, the Predacon attacked and when the sniper fired in self-defense, his bullet flew straight through.

“Hologram,” hissed Orcariner.

“A neat little trick I picked up during the war,” said a voice to his left.

A laser fired from thin air and punched into the large Maximal’s armor, sending him backwards.

“I can project an image of myself while masking my true presence.”

Another laser jetted towards Ice Sight, who managed to avoid it due to his quick agility. Returning to beast form, the snow leopard began to sniff the air, ignoring the new projected image. He dodged another shot, and immediately charged the origin point and leapt. With a cry of frustration, the real Headstrong appeared as the big cat tackled the much larger Predacon with unmatched fury, digging his claws and teeth into his robot form’s armor. Orcariner stood up and ran forward to assist his friend, but a quick jab to his side interrupted him. Falling to the ground again, the Maximal looked up at the figure who now cast a large shadow over him.

“Razorclaw!”

The Predacon leader smirked, then delivered crushing kick to his head leaving his sensors dazed and unresponsive.

“Predacons, rise!” the lion figure commanded with a booming voice.

Rampage pushed himself off the ground and assisted the still-armless Tantrum to his feet. Ice Sight, now aware that something was amiss, halted his attack and looked over his shoulder only to find three massive opponents approaching him. Headstrong used the pause to his advantage and threw the snow leopard off his chest. Outnumbered, the small Maximal transformed and cocked his sniper rifle. Powerful as it may have been, one weapon cannot down four Predacons in close range combat. The feline robot looked behind his enemies and saw the unmoving Orcariner. Whether he was dead or merely subdued, it was not important. He was alone.

“Do not even consider surrender,” growled Razorclaw, menacingly, “Don’t even let that possibility cross your mind after what you did to us before.”

Unsheathing all six of his claws, the leader lunged forward. The Maximal was quicker as he fired a bullet into his attacker’s shoulder, sending him spiraling into the dirt. Rampage had charged a nano-click afterwards and dug his claws into the white cat’s chest plate. Ice Sight raised his right arm forward and shot both of his dart missiles into the tiger Predacon’s body. Falling to the ground, Rampage shrugged off the counter attack and struck again. Razorclaw, now doubling the intensity of his strikes, helped double team the smaller cat while Tantrum stood a few meters away unsure of when to jump in. Ice Sight raised his sniper rifle again, but the Predacon leader shredded the nozzle with the first swipe and then cleanly sliced the gun in half with the second one. Jumping to the side, the Maximal fired the missile darts in his left wrist guard, but his opponents had learned from the previous attack and easily maneuvered out of the way.

“No weapons,” smirked Rampage.

“No chance of survival,” added Razorclaw.

Ice Sight quickly avoided Rampage’s lunge by transforming into beast form and then ran between the leader’s legs. The Headstrong quickly acted and fired two laser shots which exploded upon contact with the snow leopard, sending him sprawling across the sand. Finally seeing the cat in the open, the armless Tantrum was keen on claiming the killing blow. Preparing to charge with his head forward, he felt incredible resistance trying to bend forward.

“Sorry, not today,” said the recovered Orcariner, tightly gripping the Predacon by his horns.

Pulling him by his head, the large Maximal spun Tantrum around and threw him into the transwarp portal. He turned around and unsheathed his blades again, seeing his comrade unconscious and heavily injured from the fight.

“Razorclaw!” he roared, “Why don’t you fight somebody your own size, coward?”

The Predacon turned, stunned to see that the whale robot had recovered so quickly, growled and charged the Maximal. This time, Orcariner was prepared for the attack. Leaning forward, he struck upwards parrying Razorclaw’s attack. The recoil sent the Predacon’s arm upward, leaving his torso open to attack. Unfortunately, he was unable to take advantage of the opening as his opponent quickly blocked the follow up strike with his left claws. Instead, Orcariner managed to delivered a straight kick into the Predacon’s left knee and immediately used Razorclaw’s cry of pain as an opportunity to send his blade across the enemy’s mouth.

“Razorclaw!” shouted Rampage and Headstrong as they left Ice Sight’s beaten body to help their leader.

Hooking his arm into Razorclaw’s, Orcariner spun both of their bodies around and used the momentum to carve a deep wound into Rampage’s throat. As the tiger robot collapsed to his knees, trying to stop the mech fluid from flooding out of his system, the Maximal tossed aside the Predacon leader just in time to parry a blow from Headstrong’s diffraction sword. Despite having such an advantage earlier in the melee, the rhinoceros no longer had the same confidence as before. The warrior before him was more determined than ever to win this fight. He had become inspired, freed from his doubts and self hindrances. Orcariner unleashed a cry of fury as his used his left hand to grab Headstrong’s sword hand and while using his other blade to sever off the Predacon’s hand. Before his foe could even scream from the sight of his dismemberment, the Maximal grabbed his neck and flung him into the transwarp portal.

Two left, he thought to himself.

Turning around, he grabbed the shivering Rampage and kicked him into the blue portal, watching the stream of fluids blend in with the transwarp ripple effects. A glint of light caught his eyes but he was quick enough to avoid the claws cutting into his thigh. Grunting, Orcariner took a step back to avoid the follow up strike. Razorclaw roared as he lunged forward with a speed that the killer whale could not hope to match on foot. Parrying the blows as fast as he could, the Maximal struck forward but the enemy swung around him with ease. Orcariner turned just in time to block the next strike and offered a counter attack of his own to no avail. Realizing that a sword fight would lead to an endless struggle, he ran forward and absorbed a direct hit from his opponent’s claws as his tackled the big Predacon into the ground. Pinning down Razorclaw by his neck, Orcariner slammed his right elbow into his foe’s jaw. The second time, he managed to land a blow into the Predacon’s left optic sensor, shattering the glass that protected it. Razorclaw displayed surprising force when he managed to push off the Maximal and kick him in the chest, sending the black and white transformer falling backwards onto the sand.

“You’re a strong one,” panted the leader, rising to his feet, “I’ll give you that, but you can never hope to defeat me. I’m faster, more agile, and my stamina is unmatched!”

A loud snarl came from behind as a snow leopard jumped onto his back, sinking its teeth into the trapezius plate. Orcariner cried with joy inside as he realized that his friend was merely down but not out. Taking advantage of the surprise attack, the larger Maximal lunged forward at the roaring Predacon and horizontally slashed both of his blades across the exposed torso. Sparks raged from the deep wound, but Razorclaw refused to fall so easily. He stepped back while pulling Ice Sight off his back and impaled the feline with his left claws.

“Foolish cat! Did you honestly think you can challenge the king of beasts?” he shouted.

Before he could continue, Razorclaw was sent flying into the river.

Orcariner growled as he followed, “Let’s see if you’re still fast in my turf!”

The Predacon leader recovered from the attack but moved uneasily as his balance was shaken from the river’s currents. The killer whale Maximal ran towards the adjusting robot and rammed a blade into his left side. Crying out in pain, Razorclaw swung his arms in retaliation, but found that the marine based warrior was already moving around him. Another blade lashed out and slashed across the Predacon’s right hip followed by another attack that left a menacing wound across his chest. Razorclaw knew he was beaten, as Orcariner easily outmatched the land based leader in the river. He could feel the water rushing into his leg joints, disrupting his ability to walk freely in the new environment. The Maximal threw another elbow into Razorclaw’s jaw and as the Predacon leaned back from the assault, he sent another blade slashing across the lion’s head chest plate.

“Not so tough now, are you?”

Orcariner sensed victory was near. It was ironic that when he had first arrived, the water was the very thing that he had feared the most. Now it was not only his battlefield, but it was his home. He thrived in it. Like the killer whales that hunted the sea lions, he dominated it. The Predacon that limped before him was his prey, and Orcariner would make sure that he did everything in his power to defeat him. Spinning Razorclaw around, the Maximal impaled him through the back with both of his arm blades. Roaring with victory, he used the leverage to throw the defeated Predacon leader into the still active transwarp portal. Feeling a sense of liberation, Orcariner echoed that same roar once again, basking in his triumph, his moment of glory.

He sheathed his blades and took out his carbine rifle. Aiming at the transwarp device, the Maximal blasted apart the device with as many shots as he could fire. It was over. They had won. The word “they” brought Orcariner back to his senses.

“Ice Sight,” he whispered.

Running back onto the beach head, Orcariner found the still body of a snow leopard resting in the sand. Leaning over it, the Maximal looked upon the only friend he had made ever since the fall from the stars.

“Ice Sight,” he repeated.

There was silence. He ran his eyes over the body of the feline, noticing severe burns and exposed wires on his side. There were also three wide gashes where Razorclaw had impaled him. This was how it felt. This was how he felt. His mentor, the Maximal who had lost everyone and everything. It was no wonder why the rage had consumed him. It was unbearable. He was there to prevent it, and yet there was nothing he could have done but watch it all happen. Orcariner grimaced, knowing that he had just given Razorclaw mercy by sending him back to his future. It was not where the Predacon belonged. He should have been lying at the bottom of the river, rusting until his body no longer existed.

“Thank Primus you lived,” came a meek voice.

“You’re alive!” exclaimed Orcariner.

The cat chuckled, “Not…not much longer, but I am content with my fate.”

“Just hang in there,” said the larger Maximal, beginning to panic, “Let your body…”

“My body is defunct,” was the reply, “My beast form…it is damaged beyond repair. Last chance. That…was my last chance for…survival.”

Orcariner shook his head as he whispered, “No, don’t give up hope that easily.”

“Give up hope?” chuckled Ice Sight, “No, my friend. If anything, that is…all I have…hope.”

The other Maximal merely looked at him. Even in his dying moments, the older robot stilled confused him with his words.

“I will return to the Matrix,” smiled the snow leopard, “This was the moment…I have dreamed for.”

How could he be so serene? He was dying and yet the Maximal was complacent as ever, still speaking as if greater things were to come. Orcariner’s spark ached with the indecision as to whether he should rejoice for his friend’s excitement or feel immense sorrow for his friend’s impending death. Even in beast mode, Ice Sight looked happy. His silvery-blue eyes gazing at the stars, staring merrily at what he would soon call home.

He continued, “Do not be scared, my friend. You will nev-…never be alone. I trust that you shall find the others…and with them, happiness will surely follow.”

The snow leopard sharply gasped from the pain of his wounds.

“Don’t talk,” said Orcariner, quickly, “It’s okay.”

A white light shined from the mortally injured Maximal. It seeped through the cuts and openings, and his once bright eyes slowly dimmed.

“My…spark,” he whispered, “It longs…to be freed. Allow me to aid it.”

Seeing the cat struggle, Orcariner gently helped lift his friend to his feet, highly unsure of what to expect. He had never witnessed death before and frankly this experience frightened him. Part of him wanted to try to find a way to repair his comrade, but his logic told him that it was too late. Even if he had made an attempt, they were stranded in the middle of a jungle with no help nearby.

“Ice Sight,” the feline spoke as loud as he could, “Maximize!”

Orcariner watched his friend transform for the last time. Expending all of his energy, the Maximal collapsed with a smile. His spark rose from his chest, igniting the now darkening surroundings before it shot up into the sky, forever disappearing as it returned to its home: the Matrix.


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Sunlight brightly embraced the beach the next morning as Orcariner stood on the sand, staring out at the limitless ocean. The sea lions did not mind his presence, as he had stood in the same spot for a while now merely contemplating. The sky’s magnificent blue hue reminded him of his late companion’s eyes, the ones full of endless wisdom and patience. The snow that blanketed the mountain peaks behind him reflected the fur that cloaked the sniper. The ocean’s tides continued to splash the towering Maximal’s feet, begging its master to return to his kingdom. Orcariner was hesitant to leave, but he had no where else to go. The scanner back at the river bank indicated that there was nothing for him nearby, and thus, he had nothing to do but swim. It was a long journey ahead of him before he would find the Axalon, but he was patient just as Ice Sight had been. The robotic figure turned one last time to the mountain peak where he had buried his friend’s body. With the scanner’s help, it was not hard to find the stasis pod that the snow leopard arrived with. It was ironic that Ice Sight was always thankful that he survived the crash, but now that same pod was used as his casket. Orcariner left the scanner’s console at the burial site, leaving a short epitaph written on the screen in case any other Cybertron transformer stumbled upon it. However, the feline’s legacy would survive through his memories, not in those few words. These memories were the inspiration that would drive him into the unknown and beyond.

“Beast mode,” said the transformer, walking into the water.

The sea lions and birds began to flock in the opposite direction as the robot returned into the form of a killer whale. Swimming with ease, Orcariner returned to the oceanic depths where he would travel from one continent to another until he found his shipmates. He knew that there were dangers ahead, Predacon or otherwise, but Primus would watch him. He was sure of it.

Posted: Fri Aug 21, 2009 2:52 pm
by Blazemane
Well written.

When Ocariner ponders what things could go wrong in the upcoming battle, the sentences are in present tense. I think it should be past tense.

Like- "would" instead of "will", "didn't" instead of "doesn't", "had" instead of "has", "did" instead of "does", "left" instead of "leave", etc.

Also,
Perhaps he should see the situation more gratuitously than regretfully.
Do you mean gratefully?

I noticed you began paragraphs with his internal thoughts. :D

Anyways, your style is concise, but effective. I, for example, often wonder how to portray the emotions I want the reader to feel on to them, and not precisely knowing how, can end up sort of ranting. But you seem to know what you're doing, and the emotions/ironies, etc. are presented well.

Some sentences that bear pointing out for awesomeness-
"There on the vast steps of the Council Citadel, my idol stood and all I could do was stare at him with pity.”
Nice.
"This was how it felt. This was how he felt."
Effective comparison.
He laughed, “Just a bit, yeah. Everyone always called it a dead end job, so I quit.”

“What were you waiting for?”

“I’m sorry?”
I appreciated the sudden bare honesty about the purpose of life that Ice Sight so suddenly switched to.
and the light that allows my spark to shine no matter where in space or time I should be.
Subtle, effective foreshadowing. On that note-
I also kinda' sense a death on the way.
Ice Sight was this epically faithful character, and for that reason, he just screeeeaaammmed "This author's gonna kill me." Hee hee hee. Anyways, he had a very well written end. Good job on this chapter.

Posted: Fri Aug 21, 2009 4:43 pm
by Alak
lol thanks for the feedback! I made all the changes that I could. Yeah, it kind of sucked killing off my very first OC, but I can only introduce one Maximal into the RPG and leaving Ice Sight stranded on that continent alone would just be a jerk move lol. I also had to leave the Predacons alive for canon purposes :x Otherwise, we'd never get to see this awesome picture:

Image