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Fumbling Towards Ecstacy

By: Sinead

 

Author’s Note: I found out that this song would be a good beginning for the ending of the series between Sapphire and Rattrap. It has the general romance-sort-of theme for any of the couples that I’ve seen: DB and whoever . . . in this line of events, me and him, but that’s only in my own perfect little world; Rattrap and Sapphire; Starath and Megatron; Optimus and Nurannoniel; TM2DB and Lady Scale; Rampage and Lady Venom, or Lady Dementia . . . I’ve named the big ones, but it’s a good start. I do not own Beast Wars, Rattrap, Sapphire, Sarah McLachlan, the song “Fumbling Towards Ecstacy,” or any other unknown copyrighted people or things I may or may not mention. Does that take care of it?

 


 

All the fear has left me now

I’m not frightened anymore

 

 

The stranger at the door blinked at the shorter girl, clearly not quite use to someone smaller looking up at him. “I, uh . . .”

 

“Look, you wanna talk with her, you gotta go and get her to open her door first. She’s only opened it to Dad, who’s brought her food. And before you ask any more questions, I’m not answering them. Move, please, I have someone to meet.”

 

 

It’s the heart that beats beneath my flesh

It’s my mouth that pushes out this breath

 

 

It was simple to find Sapphire. Her crying could be heard through nearly the whole house. Swallowing somewhat nervously, the young man blinked, then walked towards the door. An older man was watching him. “You the boy that my youngest was yelling at?”

 

“Uh, yeah?”

 

The elder man said nothing, but handed the younger a mug filled with a steaming brown liquid, and left. After a moment of watching and listening to the steps of the baffled father, the dark brown-haired young man knocked upon the door gently.

 

 

And if I shed out a tear I won’t cage it

I won’t fear love

 

 

Sapphire sniffled, and clutched the pillow to her chest, unable to really move from her bed, feeling too weak and too drained to make any effort towards moving. A week had passed, and nothing had happened. She had only been online long enough to send two e-mails, and to receive answers to her questions. Nothing was reassuring. Both Sinead and Starath had seen Dinobot and Megatron after not more than four hours of knowing that they had “died.”

 

Maybe this time, it was different. Maybe . . . maybe he really was dead.

 

The young woman looked up, seeing a late-teenage boy with a mug of something in his hand. “Sorry, but uh, your dad told me t’ give this t’ you.”

 

 

And if I feel rage I won’t deny it

I won’t fear love

 

 

“That so?” Sapphire croaked out, throat sore from crying. “You could have knocked.”

 

“Yeah, I guess so . . . but I don’t like to. Wastes time.”

 

“Who are you.”

 

He smiled, and said, “Well, you’ll find that out yourself. Here, drink up.”

 

 

Companion to our demons

They will dance and we will play

 

 

Sapphire took the mug, and wrapped cold fingers around the comfortably warm surface. The young man sat at her desk, accidentally activating her computer. He blinked, as a voice came over the small speakers. “Sapph?! Are you there?! Is that you?!”

 

Sapphire nodded towards the microphone, and was pleasantly surprised to see that the slightly-older-than-teenager was already setting it up, and turning it on. She said, “Yeah, I’m here.”

 

“How are you?”

 

 

With chairs, candles and cloth

Making darkness in the day

 

 

Sapphire sighed, and the sound was caught upon the microphone. The voice sighed in return. “Don’t tell me: You’ve been up all night again, crying.”

 

“But . . .”

 

“And he’s not there yet.”

 

The young man finally spoke up, allowing his accent to flow free, unrestricted by the wish to keep his identity a secret for one moment longer. He hated seeing Sapphire in the state she was in, tortured by the scenes of what could have been death for him. “Dat’s not true, ’ya know, Sinead.”

 

 

It will be easy to look in or out

Upstream or down without a thought

 

 

As there was silence from Sinead’s end, Sapphire blinked at him, and he took the mug of hot cocoa from her hands before it could fall upon her bed. He took the computer microphone, and said, “She’ll get back ta ’ya in a while.”

 

Turning it off, he looked at Sapphire, who was bursting into tears yet again. “Rattrap.”

 

“Yeah.”

 

 

And if I shed out a tear I won’t cage it

I won’t fear love

 

 

Sapphire leapt into his arms, and held on tight, unable to either stop her tears, or let go of his form. He was here, he was alive . . . alive . . . and . . . she was complete again. Rattrap chuckled, and said, “Hey, look, I had t’ hitch-hike all dis way, just to see you. Surely I deserve more’n just tears.”

 

Laughing through her tears, Sapphire looked up at him, as he wiped a tear away. She smiled, and said, “Shut up, Rattrap, and hug me.”

 

The human young man grinned, and did just that.

 

 

And if I feel rage I won’t deny it

I won’t fear love

 

 

Pushing him away slightly a moment later, the girl looked into his eyes, and blinked, seeing exactly what she had once pictured him to be. He was her height . . . although a little bit taller. His soft hair was the color that of dark chocolate, and stuck out at odd angles, much like her own pet rats’ looked like, right after waking up from a refreshing nap.

 

 

Peace in the struggle to find peace

Comfort on the way to comfort

 

 

His eyes were . . . simply . . . amazing. While Dinobot . . . Donovan . . . had these perfect blue eyes, and Megatron . . . no, he was known as Micheal now . . . had blue-violet-red eyes . . . Rattrap’s were simply different and . . . comforting. They were a hazel, but it wasn’t any ordinary shade of hazel, that you would see elsewhere. They were a warm golden hazel, that seemed to embody the very meaning of acceptance towards the grieving young woman.

 

The silent words that his eyes spoke to her . . . they comforted her far beyond anything audible that he could ever speak.

 

 

And if I shed out a tear I won’t cage it

I won’t fear love

 

 

“Sapphire . . . you remember what I asked ’ya?” Rattrap asked quietly.

 

She nodded, still entranced by his eyes. The once-Transmetal smiled, and she smiled back, whispering, “You said, ‘Would you have married me?’ . . . And I replied . . .”

 

“Even if I never was going t’ be human, ’ya would,” Rattrap said, his smile broadening.

 

 

And if I feel rage I won’t deny it

I won’t fear love

 

 

“Because . . . I love you,” Sapphire said, her face beginning to lose its pale, tear-stained look, and start to fill with color again. Specifically, a blush. She looked at the mirror behind her . . . what was he? What did her heart identify him as? He most certainly wasn’t just a friend . . . he was . . . something more.

 

Rattrap seemed to sense her thoughts, and looked over his shoulder at the mirror. “Heh. Well. Lookit me, willya?” He blinked, and then patted his growling stomach, grinning at the fact that he hadn’t lost all his physical features. “And I’m built! I’m likin’ dis, Sapph!”

 

 

I won’t fear love

 

Sapphire laughed, and Rattrap smiled at her. “Hey, look, I got some whachamacallits . . . rands. Your currency. You want some scoff? My treat. An’ I think dat I have enough for a movie after.”

 

 

I won’t fear love . . .

 

 

Sapphire smiled, and pushed him gently from the room. “Let me get changed. And . . . yeah. That would be nice.”